Goodness, it's as if I write one blog post a year lately. Lol, here it is, right after the new year and I just had an incredible conversation with God and immediately thought about my blog.
Again, I was out walking, on a mission to process my thoughts.... here's what I discovered!
Last year, for the first time, I did DaySpring's "Word of Truth" quiz to discover my word of the year. My 2018 word was "JOY". I was delighted by that word and embraced it. All year ... well, at least most of it, I was thrilled to show JOY, to choose JOY, to share JOY! To me, it was seemingly an easy thing to do and it filled me with ... well, JOY!
As the new year was approaching I was excited to learn my new word all the while deciding I would continue with joy as I embraced my new word. Haha, I am surprised my new word wasn't "patience" as I kept contacting DaySpring to see when their latest quiz would be out so I could get my new word.
They were so sweet as they informed me that the day after Christmas the quiz would be up. That morning as I awoke I prayed and asked God to choose the word He wanted for me.
I was overjoyed when I discovered that my new Word of Truth ... my 2019 word of the year would be HOPE!
As I walked today and processed I admitted I was struggling. I immediately got ready to text a friend but stopped myself and poured my heart out to God instead. I shared with Him that I didn't know how to "show" HOPE. I have hope for many things. I am thrilled that God gave me that word but I had no idea what to do with it. JOY ... that was easy! It's easy to feel (okay, realistically, there were days I had to CHOOSE Joy) but it seemed to me like it was easy to spot when I was sharing JOY ... but what on earth was I suppose to do to show that I was embracing HOPE.
Suddenly God sent a situation to my mind and I realized that perhaps it's not all about me. (Ha, quite the concept). What I realized that I could do ... and perhaps that's the intent is to help others feel HOPE. All those who passed me could probably see my step get lighter and quicker and the smile on my face as I began to realize that could be my "calling" for the year.
As I continued walking, I received an email from a friend that had a story in it. The basis of the story was to share HOPE with others ... to help them feel HOPE! I smiled at the confirmation and the fact that my friend would "freak" in a good way if she knew what had just happened.
I've been feeling a little sad that I no longer walk in my favorite place ... after it was invaded by humans and all the stories of creatures I have been "encouraged" to not walk it alone. I paused to think of the trails full of my tears, my giggles, my sweet conversations with God, as well as the treasured memories of times I shared those pathways with others. It makes me smile, though, to know that although my pathways have changed a bit, I still am blessed but the lessons learned ... the nature I see ... the memories I am creating.
Into Dust by Mack Brock
Until next time ... hold onto the hope that Jesus offers!
Thursday, January 3, 2019
Saturday, February 17, 2018
Soooo, it's been a little while ...
On today's walk I was thinking about a lot of things...one being my long lost blog. My favorite place seems to have been overtaken with campers so my pathway was in a slightly different location but as therapeutic as ever.
Starting out my thoughts were "wow, this chapter in my life is pretty crazy!!" Now I know I have been in crazy times before and I began to wonder if this particular time in my life seems crazier because my parents are no longer here to share their wisdom and their prayers with me. On a positive note, my siblings have quickly stepped into that role for which I am so thankful.
For quite some time I kept thinking that the lessons God was working on me were lessons in "patience" and "being still" during this time of waiting as He continued working on me. The last few days have been a much different lesson ... lessons that were so painful that I wasn't sure I could handle....lessons that I couldn't even name initially, blinded by my own flesh.
Then suddenly, clear as day, it shone through. GRACE ... pure and simple, Grace. Oh how many times has Jesus offered me that same grace. Instead of letting little things that I can't control (yeah, that lesson is coming up momentarily) I needed to release those things and simply offer Grace to those who have (most likely unintentionally) hurt me.
Partway through my walk today the next lesson struck me hard ... CONTROL. I had no idea that part of my struggle is because I probably felt the need to control the situation. God oftentimes uses music to speak to me and that song (with the same name) popped into my head and I nearly stopped in my tracks (lol, I may have actually stopped but you know I was tracking my time). In that very moment I released the one thing I was holding onto. I seriously thought I had surrendered EVERYTHING to Him but I was apparently holding onto the one thing I thought I could control (not very effectively I might add). How freeing ... how much pressure that takes off. He knows all those little concerns I have regarding the situation ... He knows what the outcome will be ... He knows how the entire situation and each stressful moment effects me ... He is more than capable to take control and just let me rest in Him.
It IS a struggle at times, even knowing how much better it is to let Him take control. During those times I am so thankful for my friends and family who surround me with love, prayers, scripture and cheer me on along the way. Bring on the Ooblek and Splatter Painting ... haha, as I walked I was thinking about these fun ways to relieve stress and even questioned the comparison between feeling "messy" inside to the "messy" therapeutic ways of dealing with stress.
Control
Until next time ... release those things you're holding onto and let God have complete control
Starting out my thoughts were "wow, this chapter in my life is pretty crazy!!" Now I know I have been in crazy times before and I began to wonder if this particular time in my life seems crazier because my parents are no longer here to share their wisdom and their prayers with me. On a positive note, my siblings have quickly stepped into that role for which I am so thankful.
For quite some time I kept thinking that the lessons God was working on me were lessons in "patience" and "being still" during this time of waiting as He continued working on me. The last few days have been a much different lesson ... lessons that were so painful that I wasn't sure I could handle....lessons that I couldn't even name initially, blinded by my own flesh.
Then suddenly, clear as day, it shone through. GRACE ... pure and simple, Grace. Oh how many times has Jesus offered me that same grace. Instead of letting little things that I can't control (yeah, that lesson is coming up momentarily) I needed to release those things and simply offer Grace to those who have (most likely unintentionally) hurt me.
Partway through my walk today the next lesson struck me hard ... CONTROL. I had no idea that part of my struggle is because I probably felt the need to control the situation. God oftentimes uses music to speak to me and that song (with the same name) popped into my head and I nearly stopped in my tracks (lol, I may have actually stopped but you know I was tracking my time). In that very moment I released the one thing I was holding onto. I seriously thought I had surrendered EVERYTHING to Him but I was apparently holding onto the one thing I thought I could control (not very effectively I might add). How freeing ... how much pressure that takes off. He knows all those little concerns I have regarding the situation ... He knows what the outcome will be ... He knows how the entire situation and each stressful moment effects me ... He is more than capable to take control and just let me rest in Him.
It IS a struggle at times, even knowing how much better it is to let Him take control. During those times I am so thankful for my friends and family who surround me with love, prayers, scripture and cheer me on along the way. Bring on the Ooblek and Splatter Painting ... haha, as I walked I was thinking about these fun ways to relieve stress and even questioned the comparison between feeling "messy" inside to the "messy" therapeutic ways of dealing with stress.
Control
Until next time ... release those things you're holding onto and let God have complete control
Monday, May 30, 2016
Today's Victory ...
Oh how I love the lessons I learn on these delightful walks! Today is Memorial Day so, since I have the day off I thought I would get a head start reaching my step goal for the day! What better place to do that then head to my favorite place ... a place where I can be alone with the Lord, figuring out my thoughts, singing, yelling, talking out loud ... it doesn't matter because (usually) I don't see anyone else (except that time that I had been singing out loud and then spotted someone ~ yikes).
So I walked the mile to the park ... not really too hot and I was excited to get to my favorite part ... the trails in the woods where I could enjoy the beautiful majestic masterpiece that lay before me.
As I got to the entrance I quickly recalled that when I came early the last time there was still dew all over the ground and the same was true today. Soon I was walking along with only the sounds of the birds chirping "Good Morning", a few rustles in the bushes ... and the water sloshing in my soaked sneakers. Within moments I saw "critter" run into the safety of the woods. In my mind I saw black with a lot of white. Haha, walking in the woods is always a boost to your prayer life as I quickly said, "Lord, please don't let it be a skunk!" As I got closer, I realized my "skunk" was simply a scared little bunny.
With a heart full of thanksgiving, I continued down the pathway, seeing other little bunnies and hearing some other noises that I kept telling myself were bunnies. :) Meanwhile, I continued to sort my thoughts, talk to God and began texting my BFF, telling her about my delightful walk. Suddenly, I heard a noise and looked up and spotted him. Sporting that huge body that looked like he could knock me over with one bump (when in reality I would probably keel over if he took another step towards me) I quickly sent her a text "Wild hog .. turn around? Try to pass? Run? Scream? Remain frozen?" Well, she didn't know either and I really wanted to keep walking so I bravely reminded myself (and the Lord) that I knew what He could do with lions so surely a little piggy would be no problem.
I am so glad I overcame that fear and continued walking. I was in awe of the beauty I saw ...
...amazed by thoughts and ideas that He gave me as I walked and the small victories I felt with each new goal.
I finally reached a point on the trail where I could go straight or to the right or left. Already trying to keep in mind where each fork in the road was and knowing I would have to walk all the way back I decided to turn around.
Hopes and dreams revived as I saw Him working and with each new revelation I could see satan being stomped down. That was pretty exciting.
I head back to the park area ... before I even got there my fitbit alerted me that I had made my goal. That was pretty exciting! With my new improved attitude & outlook and armed with fun new ideas for my (ongoing) latest project I started on my mile trek back home. Haha, wait for it ....
how appropriate that the name of my street is Victory! What a beautiful beginning to my day ... and this life's journey the Lord has me on. He is writing a beautiful story and I am thrilled for those exciting adventures He writes in ... all to teach me a lesson or to remind me that He wants the best for me and He is all things to me (my Defender, my Protector, my Provider, my Everything).
Until next time ... enjoy the adventures and lessons and don't forget to look at the beauty in each day!
So I walked the mile to the park ... not really too hot and I was excited to get to my favorite part ... the trails in the woods where I could enjoy the beautiful majestic masterpiece that lay before me.
As I got to the entrance I quickly recalled that when I came early the last time there was still dew all over the ground and the same was true today. Soon I was walking along with only the sounds of the birds chirping "Good Morning", a few rustles in the bushes ... and the water sloshing in my soaked sneakers. Within moments I saw "critter" run into the safety of the woods. In my mind I saw black with a lot of white. Haha, walking in the woods is always a boost to your prayer life as I quickly said, "Lord, please don't let it be a skunk!" As I got closer, I realized my "skunk" was simply a scared little bunny.
With a heart full of thanksgiving, I continued down the pathway, seeing other little bunnies and hearing some other noises that I kept telling myself were bunnies. :) Meanwhile, I continued to sort my thoughts, talk to God and began texting my BFF, telling her about my delightful walk. Suddenly, I heard a noise and looked up and spotted him. Sporting that huge body that looked like he could knock me over with one bump (when in reality I would probably keel over if he took another step towards me) I quickly sent her a text "Wild hog .. turn around? Try to pass? Run? Scream? Remain frozen?" Well, she didn't know either and I really wanted to keep walking so I bravely reminded myself (and the Lord) that I knew what He could do with lions so surely a little piggy would be no problem.
I am so glad I overcame that fear and continued walking. I was in awe of the beauty I saw ...
...amazed by thoughts and ideas that He gave me as I walked and the small victories I felt with each new goal.
I finally reached a point on the trail where I could go straight or to the right or left. Already trying to keep in mind where each fork in the road was and knowing I would have to walk all the way back I decided to turn around.
 |
| Going for a family walk |
 |
| It was incredible how God designed these creatures to know just what to do when some potentially crazy lady approaches them and tries to reassure them that I have no intention of hurting their babies. I again prayed for protection as the daddy hung back to try to get behind me to rush in and save the day, having me surrounded...then heading towards me. |
Hopes and dreams revived as I saw Him working and with each new revelation I could see satan being stomped down. That was pretty exciting.
 | ||
| This is the point where I know I have 15 minutes until I am back out of the woods. |
Until next time ... enjoy the adventures and lessons and don't forget to look at the beauty in each day!
Being Refined!
Recently I have been going through a fair amount of craziness in my life. I find that if I focus on those things that people say or do it has the potential to discourage me and bring me down. Well, I know that is not where God wants me so I try to live by the philosophy that people won't determine what kind of day I am going to have. I can and will continue to spread sunshine around me.
I must admit, though, that a few minor events happened one on top of the other and individually it may not have caused much disruption but for a moment, all combined, it lead me to feel disappointed about other things (again, of which I have no control). As I was sharing with my mentor yesterday a few of the incidences, he, without hesitation (as he's so good at), informed me that I was being 'refined'. I immediately thought of the story below as I have read it many times.
Malachi 3:3
The Refiners Touch
There was a group of women in a Bible study on the book of Malachi. As they were studying chapter three they came across verse three which says, "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver." This verse puzzled the women and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.
I must admit, though, that a few minor events happened one on top of the other and individually it may not have caused much disruption but for a moment, all combined, it lead me to feel disappointed about other things (again, of which I have no control). As I was sharing with my mentor yesterday a few of the incidences, he, without hesitation (as he's so good at), informed me that I was being 'refined'. I immediately thought of the story below as I have read it many times.
Malachi 3:3
The Refiners Touch
There was a group of women in a Bible study on the book of Malachi. As they were studying chapter three they came across verse three which says, "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver." This verse puzzled the women and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.
One of the women offered to find out about the process of refining
silver and get back to the group at their next Bible study. That week
the woman called up a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him
at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest
in silver beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver. As
she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and
let it heat up. He explained that, in refining silver, one needed to
hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest
so as to burn away all the impurities.
Silver smith putting heat to a silver bowl
The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot - then she thought again about the verse, that He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver. She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. For if the silver was left even a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.
The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?" He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's the easy part -- when I see my image reflected in it."
If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that God has His eye on you and will keep His hand on you and watch over you until He sees His image in you.
AUTHOR UNKNOWN
As much as I read these things and understand them, I don't always recognize that my experiences are sometimes correlated with this so I was thankful that he pointed that out to me. How much better to know that there is a purpose for the things we are going through. God loves me so much that He wants to mold me and put me under the fire to strengthen me and make me more like him. To be the best version of me that He created me to be. How can I argue with that. Instead of feeling attacked ... now, I feel kinda special ...
Refiner's Fire
Until next time ... Don't let the tough times bring you down ... remember there is a purpose and let Him keep working on you!
Silver smith putting heat to a silver bowl
The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot - then she thought again about the verse, that He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver. She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. For if the silver was left even a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.
The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?" He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's the easy part -- when I see my image reflected in it."
If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that God has His eye on you and will keep His hand on you and watch over you until He sees His image in you.
AUTHOR UNKNOWN
As much as I read these things and understand them, I don't always recognize that my experiences are sometimes correlated with this so I was thankful that he pointed that out to me. How much better to know that there is a purpose for the things we are going through. God loves me so much that He wants to mold me and put me under the fire to strengthen me and make me more like him. To be the best version of me that He created me to be. How can I argue with that. Instead of feeling attacked ... now, I feel kinda special ...
Refiner's Fire
Until next time ... Don't let the tough times bring you down ... remember there is a purpose and let Him keep working on you!
Thursday, December 31, 2015
2015 ...A year of Change
Today is the last day of 2015. I guess like most people it's a time of reflection over the past year and thoughts of hopes and dreams for the upcoming year. I immediately thought of the big events over the past couple months and as I ventured further back I realized that we actually had a lot of changes this year. Through it all I see growth ... amazing growth ... in so many areas of our lives.
Meghan graduated from high school. She went to college and learned to live with people she hadn't known prior to leaving home. She struggled to make adult decisions and face the consequences (good and bad) of those decisions. She took on so many responsibilities that she didn't have to before. She is still learning, still growing and I enjoy our time together when she is home. I had to learn to let go a little and, after offering my thoughts, sit back and watch her make her decisions. Pray ... and trust God.
Ethan had surgery. We knew that once he was completely healed the surgery would be life changing. In actuality, the change is in the process; the journey. We all lived through his last surgery and I most definitely was not looking forward to the healing part. Had I known all we would endure I would have freaked. We had heard ahead of time what complications could happen and we were aware that he was an extreme case and he would be more apt to encounter those. We prayed ... we called on our prayer warriors ... and ... he still got the complications. Although we are sorry he had to endure such pain and treatment, the journey was incredible. I never knew one could be so physically exhausted but the people we encountered on this journey and the way God provided and sent encouragement exactly when needed was amazing. Thankfully Ethan is home ... we are able to look back and see all that we had gone through ... and we survived. God equipped us and strengthened us for each task as it happened. He has an incredible testimony. There's still things he will be required to face and he is not liking that at all but I am amazed at his spirit and how he actually seemed to handle this better (in ways) than his prior surgery although this was so much more invasive. As a mother I had to watch him endure when I was helpless to make him more comfortable. I had to make him do things that he didn't like to do. Through it all, in the comfort of the hospital chapel I learned, even more, to pray ... and trust God.
Kate had to learn how to deal with all these changes in our family. Where did she fit in and how was she suppose to feel when Meghan was away and Mom was at the hospital with Ethan? Scared for her brother ... missing us. My baby girl showed so much maturity. During the visits she learned to serve her brother and help him get sips of Gatorade. They formed a bond as she helped him do the simplest tasks. She is currently excitedly anticipating a huge mission that God has been equipping her for since she was a young child. She is raising money to go to Guatemala on her first mission trip. She was overjoyed as she saw yet another step fall into place. I hadn't even known she was apprehensive, thinking she might not be able to go. That part fell into place which much relief on her end. At the thought of sending my baby to another country and not be with her has allowed me to learn, still more, to pray ... and trust God.
As I look over 2015 I see growth. I see the ability to let go of things that God needed me to ... to pray more intentionally ... to trust Him with every single part of my life and be confident that He knows me, He knows my needs and He will always provide. He loves me and cares about the smallest of concerns. I have joy and peace. There were a lot of changes in 2015 but that's not all bad. God has surrounded us with amazing people, He's provided in so many ways. Had we not been on this journey there are so many people we would have never met. We are blessed. So, not only has this been a year of change ... it's been a year of growth and I feel more at peace and content because of these things.
I am looking forward to this new year. Entering 2016 confident that God is the same yesterday, today and forever. He will continue to equip us for each new thing He asks of us and I am very much looking forward to the incredible plan He has for our lives!
Until next time ... however you remember 2015, be hopeful and confident of Christ's love for 2016!
Meghan graduated from high school. She went to college and learned to live with people she hadn't known prior to leaving home. She struggled to make adult decisions and face the consequences (good and bad) of those decisions. She took on so many responsibilities that she didn't have to before. She is still learning, still growing and I enjoy our time together when she is home. I had to learn to let go a little and, after offering my thoughts, sit back and watch her make her decisions. Pray ... and trust God.
Ethan had surgery. We knew that once he was completely healed the surgery would be life changing. In actuality, the change is in the process; the journey. We all lived through his last surgery and I most definitely was not looking forward to the healing part. Had I known all we would endure I would have freaked. We had heard ahead of time what complications could happen and we were aware that he was an extreme case and he would be more apt to encounter those. We prayed ... we called on our prayer warriors ... and ... he still got the complications. Although we are sorry he had to endure such pain and treatment, the journey was incredible. I never knew one could be so physically exhausted but the people we encountered on this journey and the way God provided and sent encouragement exactly when needed was amazing. Thankfully Ethan is home ... we are able to look back and see all that we had gone through ... and we survived. God equipped us and strengthened us for each task as it happened. He has an incredible testimony. There's still things he will be required to face and he is not liking that at all but I am amazed at his spirit and how he actually seemed to handle this better (in ways) than his prior surgery although this was so much more invasive. As a mother I had to watch him endure when I was helpless to make him more comfortable. I had to make him do things that he didn't like to do. Through it all, in the comfort of the hospital chapel I learned, even more, to pray ... and trust God.
Kate had to learn how to deal with all these changes in our family. Where did she fit in and how was she suppose to feel when Meghan was away and Mom was at the hospital with Ethan? Scared for her brother ... missing us. My baby girl showed so much maturity. During the visits she learned to serve her brother and help him get sips of Gatorade. They formed a bond as she helped him do the simplest tasks. She is currently excitedly anticipating a huge mission that God has been equipping her for since she was a young child. She is raising money to go to Guatemala on her first mission trip. She was overjoyed as she saw yet another step fall into place. I hadn't even known she was apprehensive, thinking she might not be able to go. That part fell into place which much relief on her end. At the thought of sending my baby to another country and not be with her has allowed me to learn, still more, to pray ... and trust God.
As I look over 2015 I see growth. I see the ability to let go of things that God needed me to ... to pray more intentionally ... to trust Him with every single part of my life and be confident that He knows me, He knows my needs and He will always provide. He loves me and cares about the smallest of concerns. I have joy and peace. There were a lot of changes in 2015 but that's not all bad. God has surrounded us with amazing people, He's provided in so many ways. Had we not been on this journey there are so many people we would have never met. We are blessed. So, not only has this been a year of change ... it's been a year of growth and I feel more at peace and content because of these things.
I am looking forward to this new year. Entering 2016 confident that God is the same yesterday, today and forever. He will continue to equip us for each new thing He asks of us and I am very much looking forward to the incredible plan He has for our lives!
Until next time ... however you remember 2015, be hopeful and confident of Christ's love for 2016!
Saturday, December 26, 2015
You can run ... but you can't hide!
I love my special moments with God. I talk to Him all throughout the day, every day and trust me, He knows exactly what I am thinking ... because, well, even though He knows my thoughts, I make sure I tell Him. Honest, open book ... that's how I typically am.
I've been feeling a little melancholy lately and as I reflect on some of my most favorite memories, I am met with tears and smiles and sometimes the thoughts are so overwhelming that I just need to escape. I want to run to my safe zone ... my quiet place where I can feel free to yell, to cry, to pour out my heart. Haha, as you probably guessed, the only downfall to trying to escape ... is that I bring myself with me ... with my thoughts ... and all those things I need to escape.
Today my plan to escape wasn't as overwhelming of a need as in the past but I knew that going to my favorite place would be refreshing and help to clear my head so there I went ... to my place of solitude ... the place that sparked this blog in the first place...my park.
As I began my journey I encountered three rather large men ... big burly guys and I knew that walking alone through the trails wasn't perhaps a bright idea and I quickly determined that I would easily be overpowered despite the self defense classes I have taken in the past. My mind quickly began to form a plan, on the off chance that they may try to attack...okay, I wasn't even sure I liked the idea of them speaking to me. I busied myself making a plan and without putting any of it into action I decided I would trust God and realized that despite the positives of forming a plan, Satan was using fear to make me lose focus of why I needed to be there in the first place...to refocus my thoughts and try to see what God wanted me to see.
I began to look around and enjoy the beauty of my surroundings ... my heart was filled with thanksgiving to see that someone had mowed my pathway ... I saw butterflies ... and throughout my walk I continually heard "Do not let your heart be troubled" ... I very quickly admitted that my heart was indeed troubled and "God, there's so much I don't understand ... " then I heard "Do not lean on your own understanding". Over and over these two verses penetrated my mind with every step. I reached my destination where I had cried so many tears ... and shared so many smiles ... and dreams. It was there, today, that I again called out to the Lord, shared my troubled heart with Him and heard Him speak the words I needed to hear as new clear realizations came to my mind.
I rejoice at my time spent with Him ... so grateful for a fresh new outlook ... and knowing that He can be trusted with every part of me ... including my heart. I wiped my tears and began back down my favorite pathway with a smile on my face. As I got closer to the opening where the men had been I began practicing my words (much like Miss Clara from War Room) should they encounter me. Haha, thankfully all but one were gone and I continued my way to my car.
Until next time ... don't try to figure it all out yourself ... be open and real with God. He knows it all anyway! :) ...He can be trusted and there's nothing you can say that will shock Him.
I've been feeling a little melancholy lately and as I reflect on some of my most favorite memories, I am met with tears and smiles and sometimes the thoughts are so overwhelming that I just need to escape. I want to run to my safe zone ... my quiet place where I can feel free to yell, to cry, to pour out my heart. Haha, as you probably guessed, the only downfall to trying to escape ... is that I bring myself with me ... with my thoughts ... and all those things I need to escape.
Today my plan to escape wasn't as overwhelming of a need as in the past but I knew that going to my favorite place would be refreshing and help to clear my head so there I went ... to my place of solitude ... the place that sparked this blog in the first place...my park.
As I began my journey I encountered three rather large men ... big burly guys and I knew that walking alone through the trails wasn't perhaps a bright idea and I quickly determined that I would easily be overpowered despite the self defense classes I have taken in the past. My mind quickly began to form a plan, on the off chance that they may try to attack...okay, I wasn't even sure I liked the idea of them speaking to me. I busied myself making a plan and without putting any of it into action I decided I would trust God and realized that despite the positives of forming a plan, Satan was using fear to make me lose focus of why I needed to be there in the first place...to refocus my thoughts and try to see what God wanted me to see.
I began to look around and enjoy the beauty of my surroundings ... my heart was filled with thanksgiving to see that someone had mowed my pathway ... I saw butterflies ... and throughout my walk I continually heard "Do not let your heart be troubled" ... I very quickly admitted that my heart was indeed troubled and "God, there's so much I don't understand ... " then I heard "Do not lean on your own understanding". Over and over these two verses penetrated my mind with every step. I reached my destination where I had cried so many tears ... and shared so many smiles ... and dreams. It was there, today, that I again called out to the Lord, shared my troubled heart with Him and heard Him speak the words I needed to hear as new clear realizations came to my mind.
I rejoice at my time spent with Him ... so grateful for a fresh new outlook ... and knowing that He can be trusted with every part of me ... including my heart. I wiped my tears and began back down my favorite pathway with a smile on my face. As I got closer to the opening where the men had been I began practicing my words (much like Miss Clara from War Room) should they encounter me. Haha, thankfully all but one were gone and I continued my way to my car.
Until next time ... don't try to figure it all out yourself ... be open and real with God. He knows it all anyway! :) ...He can be trusted and there's nothing you can say that will shock Him.
Saturday, December 5, 2015
Above and Beyond My Wildest Dreams ...
As our journey continues, I am simply amazed. God has continually, without fail, given me "just enough" for the next task and I have found that I have been able to do things that could only be done with the Lord strengthening me (just as He promised).
Another promise that holds true is this:
The week after my son was discharged from a lengthy hospital stay I had a huge "fight" on my hands trying to receive his much needed pain meds. It was a needless and senseless battle as he should never have been discharged without it. Anyway, many times we face things so that God can be glorified. I finally decided to try his pediatrician, hoping for just one refill on his prescription. Yes, I sometimes think too small when we have such a great God. We ended up receiving more than we could ask, think or imagine...and I immediately thought of the above verse.
Yesterday my dad went into the hospital in the early morning to receive his new heart valve. I prayed ... I asked many of my friends to pray ... Dad did very well and the doctor said he couldn't have asked for a better surgery. Ah, but wait! That morning, a "new and improved" heart valve arrived at the hospital and my dad was the first person at that hospital to ever receive one. Isn't that just like God ... to provide more than we could ask, think or imagine!?!
Over the past few months God has been working on me in ways that I hadn't expected. As I receive His gifts and spot little glimpses of how He is working, I know when all is said and done I will again stand in awe and I see He went above and beyond my wildest dreams as I receive something more than I have been asking, thinking and imagining. That, my friends, is pretty exciting!
Until next time ... you may be thinking small, but we serve a bigger God and He has so many great plans and amazing blessings He wants to pour on us!
Another promise that holds true is this:
Yesterday my dad went into the hospital in the early morning to receive his new heart valve. I prayed ... I asked many of my friends to pray ... Dad did very well and the doctor said he couldn't have asked for a better surgery. Ah, but wait! That morning, a "new and improved" heart valve arrived at the hospital and my dad was the first person at that hospital to ever receive one. Isn't that just like God ... to provide more than we could ask, think or imagine!?!
Over the past few months God has been working on me in ways that I hadn't expected. As I receive His gifts and spot little glimpses of how He is working, I know when all is said and done I will again stand in awe and I see He went above and beyond my wildest dreams as I receive something more than I have been asking, thinking and imagining. That, my friends, is pretty exciting!
Until next time ... you may be thinking small, but we serve a bigger God and He has so many great plans and amazing blessings He wants to pour on us!
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